The below is an off-site archive of all tweets posted by @lopp ever

September 2009

sitting on the couch |
I am a wii swordmaster |
dog farts fill the room

via twitux

@shannonholato i think your tweet got cut off. you mean keep them ON?

via Seesmic in reply to shannonholato

wait, what? amber alert issued for a 9 month pregnant 12 yr old girl? http://idek.net/XD3

via Seesmic

mel gibson jogging with his hand up a beaver http://idek.net/XCx

via Seesmic

while on the bike (seen in slo-mo): large acorn falls from tree, bounces 5 ft straight back up in air, crashes into faceplate @ 60 mph

via twitux

just got the biggest ‘oh shit’ look from the UPS guy as I opened the door to him throwing my package at the porch from 30 ft away.

via twitux

“On a good day, Sansalone said he can make $20 an hour panhandling” (in Raleigh) http://www.wral.com/news…

via Seesmic

are you a douchebag? if so, you can get $25 off hotels in vegas - http://www.vegas.com/dou…

via Seesmic

@akuaa is something gonna accidentally my whole carbon?

via Seesmic in reply to akuaa

@seanmcnichol sheeeeit I hit folks all the time going IN to bathrooms. btw, I’m told you should get VLC player and handbrake for video stuff

via Seesmic in reply to seanmcnichol

any bathroom designed by a decent engineer will have the doors be push for EXITing so that you don’t have to grab a handle full of germs…

via Seesmic

new motorcycle land speed record: 367 MPH http://idek.net/WrW

via Seesmic

day thus far: awoken @ 4 by dog, too sore to play rball, awoken @ 7 by dog who peed his crate, oatmeal explodes in microwave, what next?

via Seesmic

seen this morning on I-40: convoy of 100 mini coopers, RV towing a truck hauling a motorcycle

via web

@goddamndave yes, “a 99% solution that nobody has” == a previously nonexistent and currently nonexistent solution

via twhirl in reply to goddamndave

anybody else had enough of the gratuitous use of autotune in pop music these days? please limit it to songs featuring T-Pain kgr8thx

via twhirl

when constructing a firing range, please ensure that the backstop is angled such that slugs are directed into the ground http://idek.net/WGF

via twhirl

Fox in Socks on beatbox: http://j.mp/10iduI

via twhirl

Worse is Better. A 50%-good shipped solution beats a 99% solution that nobody has b/c you’re endlessly tweaking it. Shipping is a feature.

via twitux

I roll three Jedis deep |
The fleet of peeps that I creep |
All got vests underneath

via twhirl

you can’t go to the all-you-can-eat chinese buffet and NOT have a squid: http://yfrog.com/0237cgj

via twhirl

a REAL man would haggle down the outrageous price http://idek.net/V~t

via twitux

finally broke down & used adaptec’s windows RAID mgmt software because I NEED to add drives to my array… and I found a critical bug. FML.

via twitux

RT @goddamndave: Naked weight: 191.8 lbs

via twhirl

my conservative estimate (based on $3B annual revenue) is that chick-fil-a loses out on $430M in annual revenue by being closed every sunday

via twhirl

@jasonmalone the jaguars are badass, and i could tell from the gleam in their eyes that they wanted to make a snack out of you

via web in reply to jasonmalone

“At the bottom of the endless pile of paper work which characterizes all regulation lies a gun.” — Alan Greenspan

via web

the war for the future will be fought in the past

via web

would pay a tidy sum for a chemical to feed my trees that would save me from having to pick a grillion pine cones out of my yard this fall

via web

dropped by the ABC store for the first time in months. the manager cringed when she recognized me (due to the pomegranate tequila fiasco)

via web

started watching the 4400 - great show that i never heard anyone talk about. why not? the plot is quite similar to that of heroes…

via web

stargate universe? a new stargate series? wooooooooooooooooooooooooooohooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

via web

stage 2 of jaguar cichlid breeding is a success.. saved from being eaten by parents. i think there are over 500 fry http://idek.net/VNJ

via web

http://twitpic.com/i7od6 - jaguar cichlid fry with their parents watching over

via TwitPic

i’ve played a lot of half life mods… this one ranks up there http://bit.ly/rY6KG

via twhirl

RE: trending topic of “Burglar Arrested After Checking Facebook During Robbery.” - there was no victim during the crime thus it’s a larceny.

via web

thanks for nothing @adaptec_support - paid $600 for your raid controller and you can’t respond to a yes / no question within a week?

via twhirl

badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger kitty http://idek.net/UzA

via twhirl

@sweetlydrifting plenty of people think they are special and can do whatever they want without consequence. y u think our prisons are full?

via twhirl in reply to sweetlydrifting

it’s been far too long http://bit.ly/8H874

via web

it’s so easy a monkey can do it http://bit.ly/emH7y

via web

“WTF, did you get stung by a bee?”
“Yes, a bee… with herpes.”

via web

yahoo’s IM infrastructure blows - getting consistent 20% packet loss

via web

@seanmcnichol yea but only about half a dozen, and not any in the carolinas or virginia

via twhirl in reply to seanmcnichol

encounter a merchant that charges extra for using a credit card? refuse & remind them it’s against their contract with the card company.

via twhirl

i hate: when someone replaces the bag in a trash can but doesn’t let the air out, thus you throw something in the can and it bounces out

via twhirl

80% of software engineers regard this as a truism: http://idek.net/Uk4

via twhirl

While you were all talking about Obama calling Kanye a jackass, he was talking about extending The Patriot Act

via twhirl

redecorating with some help from @etsy

via web

Kim Jong-Il injects himself with the blood of virgins to stay young. And much, much more… http://idek.net/UXG

via twhirl

drinking an orange blossom pilsner squared - tasteful AND intoxicating… truly the queen bee of beers

via web

swayze crazy 4 life

via web

Team Deboccery (@lopp & @justinjas) is gearing up for some epic bocce ball play. Seems like most other brontos are too chicken to sign up.

via web

wtf WRAL RSS feed: groom killed, skateboarder killed, ballerina killed, construction worker killed, former teacher killed, teen killed…

via twhirl

sure it’s a sad story, but he’d probably be alive if he bothered to wear a seat belt http://idek.net/UJD

via twhirl

Fare thee well gone away |
There’s nothing left to say |
But I’m a free born man of the USA

via web

birthday present to myself: a Rainbow SE vacuum system with shampoo attachment. just vacuumed my living room 3 times; carpet is white again!

via web

1 more year until my insurance rates drop. It’s all downhill after that, right?

via web

@dcurtis that’s the phenomenon that is known as an ‘eargasm’ - i love it

via twhirl in reply to dcurtis

Everyone wants to work for a nice person who is always right; engineers prefer a jerk who is always right over a nice person who is wrong.

via twhirl

best shirt.woot evar sold out in under 3 hours - goes back on sale tomorrow! http://bit.ly/hAuit

via twhirl

But if we learn from a mistake and become better for it, shouldn’t we be rewarded for the learning, rather than punished for the mistake?

via web

Our world, with its rules of causality, has trained us to be miserly with forgiveness. By forgiving too readily, we can be badly hurt.

via web

$&@* durham is outlawing dog tie-outs on jan 1. my HOA doesn’t allow cheap fences. where’s my bailout so that i’m not a criminal?

via web

@ddahlke you can never have too much firepower when it comes to defending yourself against clay pigeons

via twhirl in reply to ddahlke

buy this game, now. the price is right at $5 - http://idek.net/Tly

via twhirl

i haven’t purchased a firearm in over a year… i’m digging a rotating bolt, gas-operated semi-auto 12 gauge shotgun http://idek.net/TlV

via twhirl

@sweetlydrifting counterintuitive, i know. unless you’re in a hybrid car, coasting in gear cuts off the fuel and results in ‘engine braking’

via twhirl in reply to sweetlydrifting

@sweetlydrifting a bit - when you do that you’re actually using more gas than if you coast while in gear

via twhirl in reply to sweetlydrifting

very similar to an idea I had, though my version was a shotgun in a side holster like they use on horses: http://idek.net/TgT

via twhirl

Once, while having sex in a tractor-trailer, Chuck Norris’ sperm escaped and got into the engine. We now know this truck as Optimus Prime.

via twhirl

$800 RAID controller. $800 worth of hard drives. Nary a peep from Adaptec support about running their RAID management software on Ubuntu.

via twhirl

The girl I’m dating is a porn star! Too bad she’s going to be so pissed off when she finds out.

via web

when I find myself behind people at the grocery store, I truly believe that cooking is becoming a lost art

via web

can anybody spare a few cups of brick mortar? my house is falling apart

via web

who do i have to scalp to get a stator cover gasket?

via web

my new favorite tv character of all time is omar from the wire. can you name a more badass mother$&#%?

via web

Bought a 2 packs of cigarettes; even researched the ‘best’ ones. Waste of $10. I can think of better ways to pay to slowly kill myself.

via web

Anybody know of a ‘computer junkyard’ in or near Durham? I need a ~6 bay INTERNAL hunk of aluminum. 5.25” or 3.5” - doesn’t matter.

via web

“I see you favor a .45”
“Tonight I do; I keeps one in the chamber in case you’re wondering. At this range even if I miss, I can’t miss.”

via web

In accordance with my pledge to try new things, I purchased a 5 hr energy shot. Not feeling anything now other than a bad taste in my mouth.

via web

Life; you know what that is? It’s the shit that happens while you’re waiting for the moments that never come.

via web

nothing in the world is more expensive than ‘free’

via twitux

who knew that you could buy cornhole for wii?

via twitux

An 8 year old walks into a bar and orders a scotch. The bartender says “you’re too young to be in here” and kicks him out.

via twhirl

study shows that women are just as likely to cheat, but they’re better at lying to cover it up http://idek.net/Sg6

via twhirl

it is unfortunate that the wireless wii sensor bar inactivity alarm sounds exactly like my raid card’s degraded array alarm. whoops.

via twitux

just scored 2500 on my first try, wii sports resort 100 pin bowling… 7 strikes in a row

via twitux

can barely walk due to severe rope burns around both ankles. thanks, remi.

via twitux

turns out my wii sensor bar wasn’t broken; the power output for the sensor bar on the wii is dead. wirelessly powered sensor bar FTW.

via twitux

General error: 1205 Lock wait timeout exceeded; try restarting transaction.

via twhirl

was quite excited to get wii sports resort, only to discover that my neglected wii sensor bar has died at some point in the past 6 months

via twitux

it’s been a long time but we meet once again, CSS… and fuck you again, IE… #missingmike9r

via twhirl

yes, stare at the code monkeys through the window for nearly a minute straight. yes, it’s incredibly awkward because it’s not one-way glass.

via twhirl

i need a dog bed wrapped with kevlar… nothing with fluffy internal padding is safe - not even denim

via twitux

Everybody is drooling over Snow Leopard, but Karmic Koala can hold its own: http://idek.net/S68

via twhirl

The game’s out there, and it’s play or get played. That simple.

via twhirl